Success Stories These are not real names of teen mothers
I was 17. My parents were divorced. My mom overheard me telling a friend over the phone, and then flipped out on me. I told my father, who lived far away, over the phone when I was 6 months along. My mom discussed abortion. My father tried to convince me to give my child to a “nice couple” my aunt knew; they wanted to adopt. I didn’t do either. I didn’t want to give up my child. I resented them for trying to force my decision. i was poor. I worked as a waitress, a receptionist, and at one point a tow truck driver to make ends meet while I went to school. I received social assistance: child care assistance and medicaid for my daughter. I didn’t have health insurance for myself until I was about 24 or 25. I am no longer with my child’s father, and he is not a success. This is difficult for many reasons, but I am now happily married to a new man and have 3 children with my spouse/soulmate. He is a wonderful partner and step-dad. All of my children love him so much! I didn’t become a success in spite of having my daughter, I did it because of her. She motivated me! As a result, I am more successful than many/most of my peers from high school.
This is my birth story: Fifteen with twins. It was the night of my year 10 formal. I went with my boyfriend, Cameron, of 3 years. We had a really good and fun night and decided to sleep together later that night. Around Christmas/New Year time I started to feel quite sick. I had missed a period but didn't think much of it since it was still quite new to me and the have odd times. On the 5 Jan my older sister, Kate, took me to the doctors because of how sick I was. They looked at me and did some tests and then told me the news- I was pregnant. At first I was in shocked. I didn't know what to do. But then Kate hugged me and said it will all be ok. When I got home I was brave enough to tell my parents. They were both watching TV on the lounge. I walked in and just told them straight out. They were so surprised ( I was a straight A student that was in dance groups, choir, musicals, social justice group and tennis) they never thought I would get pregnant. The first thing my mum did was hug me. My dad just kept saying you should have been more careful. After that we just talked about and I was keeping the baby. The next day I asked Cameron over. I sat him down sand told him. He didn't take it well and left. I was so upset but I had Kate and my parents to help me through it. A few days later I was scheduled to go out with my two besties, Hanna and Maddie. When I told them they were surprised and supportive. Then it was school time. When I returned to school to start a new year I was already 4 months pregnant but I wasn't too visible luckily. I got called a lot of names but I had Maddie and Hanna to support me and clear up rumors and things. When I got my first ultrasound I found out I was having twins! I had so many emotions then. I was having twin girls. My whole family was do excited. We had the baby's room ready all in pink by the time I was 7 months. When I was around 7-8 months Cameron came back to me. He said he was stupid to leave and can't imagine his life without me. I decided to take him back and give him a chance. One day when I was just at home reading a magazine my water broke. I was only 8 months pregnant so I was shocked! I ran and told Kate and she called mum and dad and took me to the hospital. When I got there I was 9 cm dilated and was having really painful contractions. Because I was so ready I couldn't have an epidural and had to push through the immense pain.
“There’s such a big change from being in charge of just yourself to being in charge of another life,” says Faith Hillis, speaking about her experience as a mother. “Having a baby changes everything.” Faith, now 20 years old, learned this life lesson early. Two months before her 16th birthday, she found out she was pregnant. Between the social stigmas they face and the fact that pregnancy and parenting is challenging at any age, adolescent mothers can feel very alone. When Faith got pregnant with her second child, Addison, now five months, she chose to enroll in Teen Outreach Pregnancy Services (TOPS), a program funded by First Things First, which offers free services to pregnant and parenting teens to ensure healthy pregnancies and a healthy babies . Faith says that having children changes everything, from her sleep patterns to her social life to her volume of bills. But through TOPS, she doesn’t feel that she is navigating these changes alone. “TOPS is one of the best places I’ve been to,” says Faith. “People there aren’t going to judge you because they’re going through the same thing,” she adds. “TOPS doesn’t look at me as a teen parent. They look at me as a human being.” He said "This is going to be the hardest thing you’ll ever do. But, it’s going to be ok. We’re not going to raise this baby for you, but we’ll do everything we can to help you have a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby." Faith is grateful for these words, which she says have helped her become the mother she wants to be. When her first daughter Hannah , now 3 years old, became a toddler, Faith was also able to access a scholarship from First Things First to send Hannah to preschool. Faith says that preschool is helping Hannah build the skills she needs to succeed in school and beyond, including learning the alphabet, building social skills, and correctly identifying shapes. “She knows more about shapes than I do,” laughs Faith. “You’re super smart, huh?” Faith asks her daughter. Hannah grins, bouncing the pink bows on her pigtails as she nods. In addition to ensuring her daughter receives quality preschool, Faith is committed to continuing her own education, a goal encouraged by TOPS. Before she found out she was pregnant, Faith knew she wanted to go to college. After having a child, many adolescent mothers give up these kinds of dreams.Faith has not given up. In the Fall, Faith is getting married to Addison’s father- her boyfriend of two years- and will attend college to become a Physical Therapist’s Assistant, a degree she intends to use to work with veterans. “Now, my life is better than I ever thought it would be when I was 15 and pregnant,” says Faith. “I used to think, ‘I’m never going to finish school; I’m never going to have the life I wanted.’”